• Menu
  • Menu

Czaban on the Redskins’ mess, Mushnick on Clemens

First, Steve Czaban has the read of the day regarding Dan Snyder’s hiring Jim Zorn to be the new head coach of the Washington Redskins. Dan Snyder is another boy king in the same line as Jim Dolan of New York Knicks and Tiennamen Square Garden infamy. Snyder is clumsily trying to buy a championship and is living vicariously through his players.

All that will be left is for him to one day look at Vinny Cerrato and say, “Why don’t I call the offensive plays?” and won’t that be fun to watch. As for Vinny, I’ve never seen a loyal terrier look so useless since John Edwards.

I got that Tiennamen Square Garden crack from Phil Mushnick. He’s right. With Garden security nothing more than thugs and pimps for Jim Dolan and whatever bad acid he’s peddling, with freedom of speech repealed within building premises and paying customers treated like criminals, that shoe fits. Dolan breaks every rule of New York City – don’t burn the locals, don’t terrorize the help, don’t prey on the tourists. Bloomie and Spitzer should run him out of town on a rusty old rail. Too bad Dolan’s into basketball and not football because Sheriff Roger Goodell would knock some sense into him.

Anyway, I disagree with Phil’s column today in the Post. I see where Phil’s premise leads. He’s afraid that because the congresspeople on the House Committee for Oversight and Government Reform Committee met with Clemens, they may go easy on him. I disagree. While one politician from Brooklyn took the opportunity to glam for the camera, he’s not on the O and G.R. Committee.  Sure a few low-level staffers may have gotten an autograph, but the House Committee Members all know what’s at stake here.  Via his lawsuit, Clemens alleged misconduct by the government.  They can’t take that allegation lying down.  Clemens painted a huge target on his chest to go with that “guilty” sign he wears due to Pettitte’s admissions.
Moreover there are other clues. The head of the Committee, Henry Waxman, (D-Va), sent a stern letter to Clemens’s counsel, fire-breathing Houstonian Rusty Hardin asking him to clarify the record regarding Hardin’s semmingly unecessary grandstanding and tubthumping against Federal Agent Jeff Novitzky, the officer who brough down BALCO. Reading between the lines, it seems a warning to tone it down fast. We’re not buying it.  All that nonsense about this being the next Duke Fake Rape Case is posturing and poorly thought out posturing as well.  Oh well, I guess he’s earning his fees and if Roger wants to pay him to be a loyal terrier and he likes it, bully for him.  “He’s always been a maverick” said one Houston attorney who spoke on condition of anonymity.
With all the documentary and physical evidence procured by the government, Clemens’s goose is likely cooked and cooked to a golden brown, ready to be carved and served with a nice honey glaze and pomegranate sauce. He will be investigated by the Department of Justice for perjury and what once was the greatest fear of MLB will now become its salvation.
You heard me. The burning of Clemens at the stake will distract public attention away from the owners and their turning a blind eye to massive profiteering from drug-fueled cheating. And that, dear reader, is why I believe Bud Selig really got that contract extension. Nobody will be investigating Peter Magowan for anything. Although it still mystifies me what he will do to bring in the required 3,000,000 fans a year to his park to pay off the 20-year mortgage now that Bonds is gone.  Who’s going to care about a bunch of billionaire owners we never saw anything of in the sports pages when the greatest pitcher of a generation is falling on his sword in a drug-and-scandal-filled mess before our eyes?  Nobody, that’s who.  Play ball!

Leave a reply