Believe it or Not, Golfer Bryan Saltus Dedicates Victory to Grateful Dead

My friends at Awful Announcing would file this under “randomness,” but American golfer Bryan Saltus dedicated his victory this weekend at the inaugural Cambodian Open to the Grateful Dead. Saltus obviously didn’t Feel Like a Stranger on the Shakedown Streets of faraway Siem Reap, Cambodia, knocking the competition down like Jack Straws with the Eyes of the World upon him.

Believe It Or Not, Saltus went Around and Around the golf course for four days with a 17-under 271 score. Built to Last around the Brokedown Palaces of the Angkor Wat region (wait a minute, that’s a Yes song…wrong Jam Band…), Saltus delighted the China Cat Sunflowers and Brown Eyed Women who celebrated his victory by Dancing in the Streets. One hopes that there’s Help on the Way for his record in America, which has not seen a Saltus victory, but which would be loudly celebrated as the Greatest Story Ever Told by every aging hippie from Berkeley to Hampton Virginia, that is if they could take the Graffix out of their bong-hole long enough to hoot and holler one jot about golf – proof once more that the world is going to Hell in A Bucket.
Bryan, I Know You Rider…you and The Other Ones in your entourage will be Goin Down the Road Feelin Bad and having High Time Truckin back to the U.S. Blues as a Passenger on the next North Bound Train, so you Might As Well forget about any anonymity and resign yourself to a career of reading chumps like me making inside tour references at you.

This post is dedicated to Phish…no wait…to Ominous Seapods! I’ll dedicate the next one to Phish…or maybe Bowling For Soup…